Insecurity and I

I breathe creativity. From creative writing to filmmaking, creativity was always one constant in my life.

I applied to Agent Academy, wishing for a change. It was one of those clear skies, sunny days. A day where there is a little optimism crawling inside of you. And, after a hard day in a job that I disliked and wanting a change, I thought, ‘why not?’. It’s funny how such small decisions can put into motion the change you wanted for a long time. Or, for what seemed like forever. Sometimes all you need to do is just take that first step.

At the beginning of the programme, I was insecure. I remember mentioning that, with shame, at my interview. It was one of the things I wanted to change; to go from thinking ‘maybe I could do this job” to, ‘I deserve a chance at this job.’ Plus, of course, I wanted and still want to find a job in the creative industry that I genuinely adore.

And now, during the fifth week of Agent Academy, I can feel the anticipation building. We are moving towards engagement with the stakeholders related to our brief for CGI. I will be talking to people in manager’s positions’, people at the top of their game, people who can influence my future. Before, I would look at this in dread, but now I find myself looking forward to it.

There are several factors why the change that was dormant in me, now wants to come out. Firstly, the people. For the first time in my professional career, I feel like I belong. With the best cohort of them all – Manchester (sorry Liverpool cohort!). Admittedly, everyone says that about their team, and that cannot be true. Someone out there is working with a bunch of drunk thieves. But I got lucky. Everyone wants to do the best work. Everyone wants to help each other. Everyone is lovely.

Secondly, with each session, my confidence is growing. My ideas are being listened to and maybe they are not always used, but I’ve finally got a voice. I’m sure that with the weeks coming forward, my confidence will continue to increase. I will surely start being more and more talkative because of that so I apologise in advance to my Manchester cohort!

Lastly, listening to all the guest speakers has given me excellent insight into the industry, but especially when it comes to top tips for CV writing and applying for jobs. This is something that makes me feel like I have an advantage over the other young hopefuls I may be up against in the wider world. Plus, all the speakers so far have connected with my on LinkedIn and followed up on any questions that I may have had after their sessions. So, I’ve gained valuable insight and possible connections for the future – that is what I call two for a price of one!

My journey with Agent Academy and the creative industry just started, but I cannot wait to see the future. If anything, being on this programme has made my belief stronger that I will not be happy in any other industry than the creative one.

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